In the far distance, you can barely make out the volleyball net. With no one else on the beach, I was forced to play with myself...wait a minute...that didn't come out right...
Moving on...
After a fun-filled day of not wakeboarding, not swimming and not looking at hot lifeguards running in slow motion, I turned my attention to the local night life. After a brief search I soon found that one of the local watering holes was featuring a krump-dancing competition.
Unfortunately, I do not think the locals know what a krump is or what it looks like when dancing. And since I do not either, I was unable to explain it to them. Needless to say, I still think they were doing it wrong.
Of course, no trip to Arizona would be complete without participating in the official state pastime - Indian Casino Gambling. I managed to lose over US$30 dollars in a Star Wars themed video slot machine. Now, as a master of The Force (TM) , the only way I could lose at such a game was if it had been rigged.
After the infernal device had stolen all of my money, I attempted to use my Jedi powers to retrieve the unfairly lost currency. When that didn't work, I tried reaching my arm up in to the coin release, but the man in the black uniform informed me that I was not allowed to do this. Recognizing this vile fiend as a Sith Lord apprentice, if not the Sith Lord himself, I decided discretion was the better part of valor and followed his advice to "back away from the machine, you freaking whack-job." I then tried to use the subtle, yet powerful Jedi mind trick on the people in the cash room to try to get my money back, but all I got was tasered in the process.
George Lucas will be receiving a scathing e-mail from me in the near future.
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